The dictionary defines fear as "an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat". If we choose to believe that a stimulus causes the reaction of fear, we are powerless to change the stimulus/response cycle. However if we choose instead to think stimulus/belief/response then it is our belief that causes the fear. Change the belief, change the response.
Fear is habituated because we have allowed ourselves to think that things or people scare us. But instead of saying "Confrontation scares me" we can take back our power over the stimulus if we say "I scare myself when I have a confrontation"
To be better students of our fear we can ask
WHEN DO I SCARE MYSELF?
WHY DO I SCARE MYSELF?
IS IT SERVING ME TO SCARE MYSELF?
Common fears are:
Be clear that there is a difference between being fearless and being brave. Brave means you have fear but you move forward despite your fear. Fearless is the absence of fear.
People living deeply have no fear of death- Anais Nin